Friday, January 13, 2006

No motivation

It's my day off (1 of 4 actually) and things are backed up here - laundry, dusting, etc. Any motivation would help. I did take out the trash, make my husband breakfast and lunch and....oh yeah - let the dog out and brought the paper in. Ok, those last two don't really count, but I'm claiming them anyway. If I can just get some dirty dishes in the dishwasher and a load of clothes started, that would be a beginning.

I'm what you'd call a Type B personality. Things that make it to my priority list absolutely, positively have to get done. Lately, the list has been pretty damn short. The dog and cat get fed because they can't make a sandwich. Ok, we had one slow cooker meal this week. Maybe we'll have another one today.

Back in the fall, I was feeling great and talked the psychiatrist into reducing one of my anti-depressants. That was the mistake: now I'm somewhat down even after increasing the dose back to what it was. Just waiting to feel better and realizing that I should just stay with what is working. In the meantime, I'm in slow motion, sluggish, got that sad in the chest and behind the eyes feeling and have been taking extra naps. I haven't exercised, but I did make an appointment with the psychologist. My daughter is coming over today - that will cheer me up. Maybe we'll go shopping - we've got gift cards from Christmas burning holes in our wallets!

So that's how it goes with me - for every negative thought, I've learned to counter with a positive. When I'm critical of myself, I make a point of noticing any little thing that I accomplish. And my greatest skill is patience - the ability to wait however long it takes to feel better. I've felt so much worse for so much longer, so I'm confident I will be fine soon. I just hope I don't worry my husband too much.

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