Paris Libraries

I'll let you know which of these Paris libraries I manage to get into after I return from my trip. (We're leaving Friday!)

Bibliothèque Forney, Hôtel de Sens, 1, rue du Figuier, Fourth Arrondissement; phone 42.78.14.60. Open Tuesday to Saturday 1:30 to 7 p.m.

Bibliothèque Mazarine, 23, Quai de Conti, Sixth Arrondissement; 44.41.44.06; http://www.bibliotheque-mazarine.fr/. Reading room open Monday to Friday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.; closed holidays and July 29 to Aug. 15. A pass for two consecutive days is free; a provisional pass, for 10 working days, is 7.50 euros, $9.10 at 1.21 to the euro.

Bibliothèque de l'Arsenal, 1, rue Sully, Fourth Arrondissement; 53.01.25.25; Open Monday to Friday 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.; Saturday 10 a.m to 5 p.m.; closed Sundays, holidays and April 10 to 21.

Bibliothèque Ste.-Genevieve, 10, Place du Panthéon, Fifth Arrondissement; 44.41.97.97; www-bsg.univ-paris1.fr. Open Monday to Saturday, 10 a.m to 10 p.m.

Bibliothèque Nationale, 58, rue de Richelieu, Second Arrondissement; 53.79.59.59; http://www.bnf.fr/. Reading room open Tuesday to Saturday 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., and Sunday 9 a.m to 12:30 p.m. and 1:30 to 7 p.m.

Bibliothèque François Mitterrand, Quai François-Mauriac, 13th Arrondissement; 53.79.59.59. Exhibitions and reading rooms open Tuesday to Friday 10 a.m. to 7 p.m., and Saturday 1 to 7 p.m. Entry: 3.30 euros.

Valentine's Day Wedding

Despite the blizzard, my daughter's wedding was wonderful. She looked beautiful!

Throat Cancer

Those phone calls that start "I have some bad news.." just make the heart sink right down to the stomach. My brother called last night to say he has a tumor in his throat. He will need surgery, radiation therapy and chemotherapy to treat it; also an MRI will be done to check for cancer in other places. My stupid reply was "You're kidding me!" Really - I thought (hoped) it was a joke - a little prank. Not so. And he comforted me saying he'll be alright. This just sucks.


As a teen taking care of my bipolar mom, I would lay in bed with her crying in pain from arthritis praying to God to just let me have her pain instead. It's silly to think that my prayers were answered and for years I was able to avoid it, but finally the doctor diagnosed bipolar disorder. My emotional pain and distress dwarfed hers - it's hard to believe she has lived through that.

That makes me wonder if my brother had those same types of thoughts when dad had his stroke. Parents would gladly take their children's suffering. We hope and pray we could relieve our parent's suffering. Unfortunately, that isn't possible and now we experience our own illness using our parents as an example of bravery, perseverance and hope.

The new Blogger and Blog

Well, I switched to the new Blogger, lost some items, deleted links and blogs that I no longer had interest in. Then I notice - I haven't posted since the 1st of January!! Well, let me tell you - since then I have quit smoking - so there!! Other than that, we've been enjoying the new grand baby, planning a Valentine's Day wedding and trying to keep track of our parents. My dad - new nursing home, things going OK. My mom - still in nursing home, was sick, but now on the mend. My mother-in-law in MI - another trip to the hospital for irregular heartbeat, dehydration - she's supposed to come home Monday. So that's the latest quick news. Oh - and we're planning a trip to Europe around my husband's business trip. We'll go to Amsterdam, Paris, Luxembourg and we're talking about Italy. Now that is exciting!

Dad and my little bro

Fishing this summer at Cape Hatteras.

Oh Happy Day!

Finally! If you remember I posted about this in October. I will be looking forward to paying 1/3 of what I pay now for visits to the psychiatrist and psychologist.

Avah Margret

Here's my new granddaughter: Avah Margret, 7 lbs, 19 in. born Dec 28 at 4:04 am

Elves and More

Some friends of mine made the news! What a great idea.

Dear Dad

You are back in the hospital with an infection, but not as sick as before. Cindy's glad you are being cared for and we're not happy with the quality of care you had at the nursing home. It would be great to find a better place or some alternative. It's been almost 4 months since your stroke and I miss you while getting to know you at the same time. I love to spend time with you holding your hand. This is so hard for everyone - I can't imagine what it is like for you. It makes me wonder about life vs. quality of life. You are so determined and strong to keep doing your therapy. The gains are slow and small - we are so excited and proud with every improvement. I see that quality of patience and perseverance in myself, but in the same circumstances I'm not sure I could hang in there. This is a life changing event - everyone in the family is affected. My family would be very strong and take very good care of me, but I don't know if that's what is best overall.

You've been in and out of ICU again. We don't know what happens next since you have a trach and there's only a couple places that take trach patients and they are not the nicest of places. This must be tiring for you beyond belief. At this point you don't get much of a choice about your treatment or future. I hate to see you agitated and upset. Today I didn't wake you when I visited. You deserve peace and rest. I love you so much.

Personal Diction.ary

Merry Christmas to me! Yesterday, we went to visit good friends and previous neighbors, Lady H and her family. Her gift basket to me included homemade soup and sauce mix, fireside coffee mix (yum as I am sipping it now), raspberry hot cocoa mix (double yum from last night), recipes to make aforementioned mixes plus more and (drum roll please) . . . . A Christian Personal Dictionary! I am the proud owner of an exclusive, unique, numbered copy of the original Personal Dictionary published a few years ago and have now been blessed by a Christian version. What is a Personal Dictionary? you ask. Well, according to the intro page:

How to use this dictionary: Some of what follows are clearly questions. Others are not. It is more interesting and comprehensive to throw out a writing prompt in the the author - you, can fill in the words surrounding the thought and then respond. I believe how you perceive the prompt is as telling as the answer. Thus, when you are finished, the dictionary should be even more definitive.
Good luck and enjoy!

Also useful as a conversation starter, a type of memoir, or any number of other journal type of thing - the personal dictionary will make you think! Here's an example of some prompts:

• glad sacrifices
• righteous anger
• Bible character you most identify with

How can you get yours? Ahhh - you can't. Unless you deluge me with email that I forward to my friend and maybe she will consider publishing.

Thank you again, my friend and I will put your Christmas surprise in my car so I get it to you soon (hopefully before Christmas)

I Wanna Hold Your Hand

According to this NYT article (free registration is required to view the entire article),

The effect of this simple gesture of social support is that the brain and body don't have to work as hard, they're less stressed in response to a threat," said Dr. James A. Coan, a psychologist at the University of Virginia and the study's lead author. His co-authors were Dr. Hillary Schaefer and Dr. Richard J. Davidson of the University of Wisconsin.
Relaxing in the face of a perceived threat is not always a good idea. The brain's alarm system, which prompts the release of stress hormones that increase heart rate and move blood to the muscles, prepares people to fight or run for their lives, researchers say.
But this system often becomes overactive in situations that are nagging but not life threatening like worries over relationships, deadlines, money or homework. Easy access to an affectionate touch in these moments — or to a hug, a back rub or more — "is a very good thing, is deeply soothing," Dr. Coan said.

Dad often reaches his hand out and we hold it. It is comforting to know that he is being soothed.

If it's not one parent, it's two

Mom fell this week, breaking her ankle in 3 places. Surgery on the ankle consisted of opening it up on both sides and putting it back together with pins, plates and screws. The cast stays on for 3 months and she'll be going into a nursing home near her apartment building. Now my days consist of visiting both mom in the hospital and dad at The Pond, picking up my son from school, trying to feed my family dinner and maybe throwing a load of laundry in. Today I changed the sheets on our bed - whoo hoo!! I've got 20 Christmas cards in envelopes without addresses or stamps. Christmas shopping is almost done and the wrapping paper is ready to roll. I don't bake and the tree is still in the attic.

Every detail of mom's injury and hospital stay is compared with dad's. She can hit her call button, eat food, sit on a bedpan, swallow pills, talk coherently, move both sides of her body, use the phone. I have to keep my mouth shut so that she can have her own experience, her own pain and not be put down by me pointing out that dad is worse off than her in every single aspect of her experience. BTW, my parents are divorced but harbor no bad feelings now. Mom lived alone and my brother and I are double teaming her. Dad is remarried, so my step-mom and I keep up with him.

Ummm--hey that leaves me spread thin. Self-care today included a really good nap...with hubby.

Noting Thanks

People ask how dad is and when I enthusiastically answer 'good!' they mention something like a walker or going home. Well...my enthusiasm extends to dad not having an infection, not being in the hospital and being able to talk. Then I go on to explain how his TIA's (mini-strokes) prior to his major stroke affected one side of his brain, his major stroke left his left side paralyzed, damage to his basal ganglia makes his right arm and leg move involuntarily. He can't do much of anything - they use a big sling/hoist thing to get him out of bed and into a wheelchair. He is still being tube fed and is incontinent. He can't push the call button if he needs something. BUT he IS working in rehabilitation on swallowing, sitting, standing, reaching, looking to the left -- numerous things you wouldn't even think about he does even if he needs someone (or two someones) to hold him up sitting or push him up and hold him standing. I am noting thanks for him being able to gag when the speech therapist checks to see if he has sensation in his throat. I am noting thanks for every 10 or 15 seconds he can stand holding onto bars with therapists in front and back supporting him. I was thankful when he knew my step mom was gone for 6 hours even though he didn't know what year it was. The most thankful moment was the first time he opened his eyes and saw me weeks after the stroke. Another was when he mouthed my name and tried to whisper 'I love you.' Looking back and realizing how long he was unconscious (weeks) and how long he couldn't talk because of his trach (months) and noting that every day that passes means that we are that much farther away from when he had his stroke, I am thankful. To someone who is looking in from the outside, things seem pretty bad; but for me, things are 'good.' Happy Thanksgiving to All!!

Children and Domestic Violence

This article only mentions that children who witness violence can have emotional and behavioral problems. From my observations, children - no matter the age - are affected in a post-traumatic stress syndrome kind of way. Young children are traumatized by the sight of someone who should be unconditionally trusted endangering the other parent. One of the worst, deepest and lasting types of damage a kid can have is the fear of abandonment. Older kids are embarrassed and angry. Young adult children wonder about their children being affected.

Myself, I have learned to have a Zero Tolerance for domestic violence.
Also, always call 911 - whether you or your neighbor need help - don't leave cries for help unanswered.
And please file charges, get a restraining order - protect your family!

Noble's Pond

Dad arrived at what we now call 'the pond' a week ago Thursday. He worked with the therapists there, getting assessments, showing what he could do and how much assistance he needed to do them. When people ask me how he's doing and I talk about how good he's doing and how hard he's working, they will say something like 'oh, is he using a walker?' Then I have to explain that well, he really can't do anything by himself -- I have seen him go from unconscious to shaking his finger at me, giving me a hard time (all in good fun) Each inch farther he can reach, each second longer he can sit, each day he can remember what year it is -- that is progress and I am thrilled.

So he was at 'the pond' for a few days and then pulled out his feeding tube. The nursing staff put it back in, but he started vomiting, so he ended up in the emergency room where it turns out he had a bladder infection and lots of chest congestion and the doctor admitted him for a couple days. Of course, soon after starting the strong antibiotics for the infection, he got the intestinal infection he had before. Since they caught it soon, it cleared up fast and he was able to go back to the pond today.

It's a whole two-step-forward-one step-back kinda thing. Very frustrating. Requires determination, patience, perseverance and all that stuff. Dad does great with therapy - trying everything they tell him without complaining. Now if he can keep infections away, he's sure to start making two steps forward for each step back.

Look! My very own bookstore!

Anthony Burgess

In a previous post I told you about my son's interest in A Clockwork Orange. Well, he did a book report for school (he is in the 10th grade) and at first got 36/40 points with the very first thing the teacher marked incorrect being the author. Take a look at the original report:

A CLOCKWORK ORANGE
Chris L.
3rd Period
A Clockwork Orange was written by Anthony Burgess. This book has influenced culture a lot. A Clockwork Orange was originally published in 1962 in England. The book was released in the U.S. but the publisher left out the last chapter; because of this, the movie version of A Clockwork Orange (made by Stanley Kubrick) left out the ending of the book. The book is written in a first person point of view. A Clockwork Orange uses a strange vocabulary of slang terms that Anthony Burgess made up.
The story is set somewhere in the 1960's in an average city. The main character, Alex, is a horrible kid. With his gang, he commits horrible crimes; for example, robbery, rape, and vicious beatings of random people in the streets. His gang consists of 4 members: Alex (the leader), Pete, George, and Dim (Dim is the stupid, rough one). They use strange words like droog (a gang member) and horrorshow (cool or good). They dress in white outfits with black bowler caps and boots.
The book shows you the horrible things that Alex has done, and has gone through. Alex and his droogs (gang members) commit various crimes during the night. Alex is a very cocky character and eventually his gang starts to turn on him. While they were breaking into a womans house, the police were called by the homeowner. When Alex ran out of the house, he was cracked over the head with a milk bottle. His droogs got away and left him to get caught. Alex was sent to prison; in prison he heard of a special treatment that he could go through to get out of jail. The treatment was very horrible; Alex was strapped to a chair with his eyes held open. He had to watch horrible movies of murder, rape, and other crimes. The treatment eventually made him sick, so when he acted in a bad fashion, he felt sick. After the treatment he was released and had to go through horrible things.
The themes in A Clockwork Orange are very unclear. I think that one of the themes tells how people sometimes get what they deserve. Alex deserved to be imprisoned. It also shows you that people change and recieve things that they don't deserve. A man gets revenge on Alex after he is released from jail. A Clockwork Orange shows people that sometimes it's fun to be a bad person. Alex goes through phases throughout the story; at first he is a horrible person and by the end of the story he is a normal man.
I highly recommend A Clockwork Orange, it's a very interesting book. I liked it because even though Alex was such a horrible person, I grew to like him. The vocabulary used in the book is very entertaining. Although I liked this book I wouldn't recommend it to people that have gone through traumatic experiences like rape, and harsh beatings. My sister found it very offensive and disgusting. It has very horrible parts in it, but it's interesting to see a person my age change like Alex did. I also recommend the movie, although it is old, it summarizes the book very well. A Clockwork Orange is one of my favorite books.

The teacher told Chris "I don't remember who the author is, but this is wrong." So he tried to tell her maybe she was confused with Stanley Kubrick who made the film and she said no. Then he had to prove it to her on the Internet and ended up with 38/40 points for his report.

Can you hear me screaming?? A language arts teacher!!??? AND YOU THINK SHE COULD HAVE LOOKED IT UP BEFORE MARKING IT WRONG!

Pimp my Bookcart

Maybe I'll enter. Maybe I'll win. Wouldn't that be cool?

Moving on down to the 4th Floor

Dad is now in the Rehabilitation Center on the 4th floor of the hospital. He seemed anxious and after a full day today, was quite out of sorts when I got there. A busy day, a new schedule and lots and lots of work for him. The speech therapist worked on swallowing. Another day or two and his trach site will be healed over so he can do a barium swallow test. He got to have some water, pudding and other treats so that she could see how he's doing. Yummy since the only thing he's had in his mouth has been a bit of mouthwash on a little sponge and some tart lemon swabs to stimulate salivating.

Physical therapy wore him out. He complained about the pain - getting stretched after being bedridden for 6 weeks is going to be hard. He also went on about some off the wall stuff, but after he started to calm down, that went away. Our hope is that he can recover enough to come home. The hard thing is trying to encourage him without threatening him or making him feel that it's his fault if he doesn't improve. It's possible that he won't be able to accomplish certain things. And then you have to make it upbeat that working hard and being in pain is what he has to do in order to make progress. And then I wonder if therapy just keeps getting harder because once he gets to one point, there will always be more to work on. Plus we have no idea of how it feels for him and he knows it and says that and I wish we could take some of that from him. He has to do all this extremely hard work himself.

So that was Day 1. Keep tuned in!

The most interesting things can happen at Libraries

A naked display of emotion over library closings

The Friends of the Kingsteignton Library in Devon, England, are taking the threatened closure of one of 12 underused libraries by the county council seriously enough to engage in a nude protest. Local library lovers—among them several councilors at the district and parish levels—have been demonstrating against the closing of the library, rain or shine, since February. But last summer, chanting “Don’t strip us of our library,” the group staged a nude indoor protest behind a shelf of large-print books....